Apparently my many mono symptoms are caused by… not-mono. Bizarro-mono. Anti-mono, which explodes when it touches mono. I called the walk-in clinic where I’ve been going for medical care (because I don’t trust them to call me back properly, because they had my chart wrong last time), and apparently they didn’t call because I actually don’t have mono.

Which is good, I guess, except, what the hell is wrong with me? I’m not just like, inventing the fatigue part. I was having serious trouble getting out of bed in the morning before mono was even suggested as a possible diagnosis.

Presumably I have some other bizarre virus thing. I guess. I’m going back to the doctor, because, uh, I think we both thought it was mono, so he didn’t really tell me what else it could be. This clinic is going to think I’m a hypochondriac or something. This will be my third visit in four weeks. (I should really find a better doctor.) I still have bizarre swollen glands (in two places) which haven’t gone away and I still have serious trouble getting up in the morning.

I can’t believe I’m disappointed I don’t have mono.